{"product_id":"i-will-not-fix-your-computer","title":"I will not fix your computer","description":"There are simply too many DAUs, so the only thing that helps is a general rejection if you don't want to keep answering stupid questions or uninstalling Internet Explorer for the 10th time. To amuse you, we are collecting the stupidest DAU slogans here, send yours to \u003ca href=\"mailto:dau@getdigital.de\"\u003edau@getdigital.de\u003c\/a\u003e and we will include them:\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e1. How do I get rid of this table in Excel so that I can write something?\u003cbr\u003e2. We need something that allows you to download, something like Winzip.\u003cbr\u003e3My modem always makes funny noises when I dial up...\u003cbr\u003e4. I don't have Internet, I have AOL.\u003cbr\u003e5. We don't need DSL, our graphics cards can't display it at all.\u003cbr\u003e6. Could it be the router that's making the teacher's PC so slow? [The reason was: 4 times M$ Powerpoint in the background\u003cbr\u003e7. Can I also download movies from the Internet with my new CD burner?\u003cbr\u003e8. What kind of computer do you have? - Windows 98\u003cbr\u003e9. Tell me? I only have 512 MB RAM. But UT2004 needs 5.5 GB. Where should I install it?\u003cbr\u003e10. What kind of browser do you have? - I have T-Online DSL\u003cbr\u003e11. I thought there was a loose fuse \u003cbr\u003ebecause it crashes so often, then I changed the red fuse (probably means the 230V\/115V switch) at the back of the PC and then there was a bang \u003cbr\u003eand smoke and now the PC doesn't work anymore!\u003cbr\u003e12. (Note: original spelling) The computer is broken! Come and repair it immediately, otherwise I'll demand compensation!!! The computer makes noise but the TV is black. (The monitor was just switched off, nothing else)\u003cbr\u003e13. Which PC do you have? - Windows XP - Then click on Start. - There is no Start, just an apple. \u003cbr\u003e14. my digital photos are so blurred when I look at them on the PC - is my computer overloaded? They'll be sharper on a faster one, won't they?\u003cbr\u003e15. And now you should see the following message on your screen: ... - How can you see that?\u003cbr\u003e16. Question from the customer: Is there any further information on this? - My answer: Yes, of course, just look on the Internet... - Customer: Can I get such an Internet here?\u003cbr\u003e17. Customer: My raid no longer works! (indignant)\u003cbr\u003eAnswer: What kind of raid did you have?\u003cbr\u003eCustomer: Raid? What is a raid?\u003cbr\u003e18. \"A piece of my hard disk has fallen off, 60 GB are missing! I want a new one immediately, otherwise I'll call a lawyer!\" (Note: customer tried to play with Linux, forgot Grub...and then 60GB were missing under Windows)\u003cbr\u003e19. \"You forgot to install the start button on my system!\" - \"What start button?\" - \"Well, this Vista is great, but the start button is missing!\"\u003cbr\u003e20. Can I download a better graphics card from the Internet?\u003cbr\u003e21. I once had a customer who wanted a WLAN cable: He had read on the Internet that WLAN goes up to 300m and LAN only 100m.","brand":"getDigital","offers":[{"title":"T-Shirt (Fair Geekwear) \/ S \/ Black","offer_id":45376725287180,"sku":"Shirt-11-22-27-6","price":16.09,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"T-Shirt (Fair Geekwear) \/ S \/ Dark green","offer_id":45376725451020,"sku":"Shirt-11-22-27-13","price":16.09,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"T-Shirt (Fair Geekwear) \/ S \/ Navy blue","offer_id":45376725352716,"sku":"Shirt-11-22-27-14","price":16.09,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"T-Shirt (Fair Geekwear) \/ S \/ Blue","offer_id":45376725385484,"sku":"Shirt-11-22-27-33","price":16.09,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"T-Shirt (Fair Geekwear) \/ M \/ Black","offer_id":45376723681548,"sku":"Shirt-11-22-9-6","price":16.09,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"T-Shirt (Fair Geekwear) \/ M \/ Dark green","offer_id":45376724009228,"sku":"Shirt-11-22-9-13","price":16.09,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"T-Shirt (Fair Geekwear) \/ M \/ Navy blue","offer_id":45376723812620,"sku":"Shirt-11-22-9-14","price":16.09,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"T-Shirt (Fair Geekwear) \/ M \/ Blue","offer_id":45376723910924,"sku":"Shirt-11-22-9-33","price":16.09,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"T-Shirt (Fair Geekwear) \/ L \/ Black","offer_id":45376724762892,"sku":"Shirt-11-22-3-6","price":16.09,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"T-Shirt (Fair Geekwear) \/ L \/ Dark green","offer_id":45376724893964,"sku":"Shirt-11-22-3-13","price":16.09,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"T-Shirt (Fair Geekwear) \/ L \/ Navy blue","offer_id":45376724828428,"sku":"Shirt-11-22-3-14","price":16.09,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"T-Shirt (Fair Geekwear) \/ L \/ Blue","offer_id":45376724861196,"sku":"Shirt-11-22-3-33","price":16.09,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"T-Shirt (Fair Geekwear) \/ XL \/ Black","offer_id":45376724336908,"sku":"Shirt-11-22-2-6","price":16.09,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"T-Shirt (Fair Geekwear) \/ XL \/ Dark green","offer_id":45376724599052,"sku":"Shirt-11-22-2-13","price":16.09,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"T-Shirt (Fair Geekwear) \/ XL \/ Navy blue","offer_id":45376724435212,"sku":"Shirt-11-22-2-14","price":16.09,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"T-Shirt (Fair Geekwear) \/ XL \/ Blue","offer_id":45376724533516,"sku":"Shirt-11-22-2-33","price":16.09,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"T-Shirt (Fair Geekwear) \/ XXL \/ Black","offer_id":45376725025036,"sku":"Shirt-11-22-8-6","price":16.09,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"T-Shirt (Fair Geekwear) \/ XXL \/ Dark green","offer_id":45376725156108,"sku":"Shirt-11-22-8-13","price":16.09,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"T-Shirt (Fair Geekwear) \/ XXL \/ Navy blue","offer_id":45376725057804,"sku":"Shirt-11-22-8-14","price":16.09,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"T-Shirt (Fair Geekwear) \/ XXL \/ Blue","offer_id":45376725123340,"sku":"Shirt-11-22-8-33","price":16.09,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"T-Shirt (Fair Geekwear) \/ 3XL \/ Black","offer_id":49120119259404,"sku":"Shirt-11-22-16-6","price":17.71,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"T-Shirt (Fair Geekwear) \/ 4XL \/ Black","offer_id":49120119292172,"sku":"Shirt-11-22-151-6","price":19.32,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"Girlie shirt (Fair Geekwear) \/ XS \/ Black","offer_id":45376725778700,"sku":"Shirt-11-24-223-6","price":17.71,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"Girlie shirt (Fair Geekwear) \/ S \/ Black","offer_id":45376725516556,"sku":"Shirt-11-24-27-6","price":17.71,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"Girlie shirt (Fair Geekwear) \/ M \/ Black","offer_id":45376724140300,"sku":"Shirt-11-24-9-6","price":17.71,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"Girlie shirt (Fair Geekwear) \/ L \/ Black","offer_id":45376724926732,"sku":"Shirt-11-24-3-6","price":17.71,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"Girlie shirt (Fair Geekwear) \/ XL \/ Black","offer_id":45376724664588,"sku":"Shirt-11-24-2-6","price":17.71,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"Hoodie (Fair Geekwear) \/ S \/ Black","offer_id":45376725582092,"sku":"Shirt-11-48-27-6","price":30.61,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"Hoodie (Fair Geekwear) \/ M \/ Black","offer_id":45376724238604,"sku":"Shirt-11-48-9-6","price":30.61,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"Hoodie (Fair Geekwear) \/ L \/ Black","offer_id":45376724959500,"sku":"Shirt-11-48-3-6","price":30.61,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"Hoodie (Fair Geekwear) \/ XL \/ Black","offer_id":45376724697356,"sku":"Shirt-11-48-2-6","price":30.61,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"Hoodie (Fair Geekwear) \/ XXL \/ Black","offer_id":45376725188876,"sku":"Shirt-11-48-8-6","price":30.61,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bag \/ Bag \/ Black","offer_id":45376725647628,"sku":"Shirt-11-44-46-6","price":24.16,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"T-Shirt (Fair Geekwear) \/ XS \/ Black","offer_id":54781026959628,"sku":"Shirt-11-22-223-6","price":16.09,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"T-Shirt (Fair Geekwear) \/ 5XL \/ Black","offer_id":54781026992396,"sku":"Shirt-11-22-295-6","price":20.94,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"T-Shirt (Fair Geekwear) \/ XS \/ Navy blue","offer_id":54781027025164,"sku":"Shirt-11-22-223-14","price":16.09,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"T-Shirt (Fair Geekwear) \/ 3XL \/ Navy blue","offer_id":54781027057932,"sku":"Shirt-11-22-16-14","price":17.71,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"T-Shirt (Fair Geekwear) \/ 4XL \/ Navy blue","offer_id":54781027090700,"sku":"Shirt-11-22-151-14","price":19.32,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"T-Shirt (Fair Geekwear) \/ 5XL \/ Navy blue","offer_id":54781027123468,"sku":"Shirt-11-22-295-14","price":20.94,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"T-Shirt (Fair Geekwear) \/ 3XL \/ Blue","offer_id":54781027156236,"sku":"Shirt-11-22-16-33","price":17.71,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"T-Shirt (Fair Geekwear) \/ 4XL \/ Blue","offer_id":54781027189004,"sku":"Shirt-11-22-151-33","price":19.32,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"T-Shirt (Fair Geekwear) \/ 5XL \/ Blue","offer_id":54781027221772,"sku":"Shirt-11-22-295-33","price":20.94,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"T-Shirt (Fair Geekwear) \/ 3XL \/ Dark green","offer_id":54781027254540,"sku":"Shirt-11-22-16-13","price":17.71,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"Girlie shirt (Fair Geekwear) \/ XXL \/ Black","offer_id":54781027320076,"sku":"Shirt-11-24-8-6","price":17.71,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"Girlie shirt (Fair Geekwear) \/ 3XL \/ Black","offer_id":54781027352844,"sku":"Shirt-11-24-16-6","price":19.32,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"Hoodie (Fair Geekwear) \/ XS \/ Black","offer_id":54781027385612,"sku":"Shirt-11-48-223-6","price":30.61,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true},{"title":"Hoodie (Fair Geekwear) \/ 3XL \/ Black","offer_id":54781027418380,"sku":"Shirt-11-48-16-6","price":32.23,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0684\/8793\/8316\/files\/productImage-11-i-will-not-fix-your-computer.jpg?v=1762783612","url":"https:\/\/get-digitol.shop\/en\/products\/i-will-not-fix-your-computer","provider":"getDigital","version":"1.0","type":"link"}